"...On Broadway..."

Last night was my first dance class--ever! I’d never taken one before because I was under the impression that I was not born well-coordinated. I was a brain, not a body. I grew up thinking of myself as an artist and a smarty pants, not a dancer, actor, athlete, or musician. Consequently, I never really tried any of those things. Until now.

Actually, a little before now. I did do two plays in the local community theater where I was living, about eight years ago. We did “It’s a Wonderful Life”, and in the script Uncle Billy had a wife--Aunt Tilly—which is who I played. It was an amazing, eye-opening experience for me, one who had only acted once previously—in high school, where I had the proverbial actors’ nightmare happen, forgetting my lines onstage, because I knew the girl who’d been making fun of me was in the audience. In IAWL, I got to play an older woman, kind of a ditz, but very lovable—the doting aunt who never had kids of her own. People told me I had created a character—and not just people: real live actors, who’d been doing it for years. Holy shit! But without the Assistant Director’s help, I never would have gotten there. She sat me down, and she had me tell the story of Aunt Tilly, in character, as if Aunt Tilly was narrating an autobiography. That opened up my mind. I remember how, with each rehearsal, I’d get closer and closer to getting her character down, along with the lines and her voice and mannerisms, and by opening night, I had it nailed. It was sense memory; doing the same actions over and over again until they became automatic and I didn’t have to think about what I was doing. Associating the lines with the gestures I was doing as I was saying them. And that’s when I knew I had hooked into something: the body and mind are lovers, not fighters. I so loved that feeling! But because life happened soon afterward, I only did one more play—a walk-on role in a show I was AD-ing, “Last of the Red Hot Lovers”. I played a delivery girl in NY, and I tried to do the gum-chewing, coarse, looks-inside-your-apartment kind of character. I made it my own, and I thought it was hilarious. But even though I haven’t done it in years, I still think about getting back into acting someday—just for the sheer fun of it. I’ve learned so much about it, from life, since then. So it’s still on the backburner of my mind.

But dance! I’ve always lived for dancing. It’s one of my favorite things in life. Just going out on the floor and dancing till I dropped was the ultimate high. I loved going to weddings, bar and bat mitzvahs, and prom, just because I knew I would get to dance. But it was all freestyle. I could never do step dancing. I just couldn’t keep track of what other people were doing and copy it. I always lost the momentum and screwed up. Which is why I never went line dancing (oh, and the fact that I hate country music…right!). So I rigidly thought it wasn’t possible that I could learn choreographed dance steps. For years.

Now, two of my favorite movies of all time are “All That Jazz” and “Cabaret”—I guess you could safely say I’m a fan of Bob Fosse’s work, as he choreographed both films. Watching dancers do their thing made me want to try—it looked SO fucking fun to do! Not on their level, naturally, but on my own cute little baby level. Like a kid imitating adults, who are ever so much more skilled. I would do certain moves to my Squirrel Nut Zippers CD’s in my living room, but would also feel unsatisfied, like I was just playing and not doing it right, because I didn’t really know the moves. So I needed to get serious.

I signed up for Beginning Jazz.

Last night was the first class. Naturally we warmed up first—stretching and stretching. Then we learned some steps, some basic, easy-for-beginners moves. And then we practiced those moves across the floor, in groups of three. Then we started learning the beginnings of a routine. Very sexy. Definitely a woman’s dance, involving much hip-age and the sexy twirly-wrist arm raise. Now when you do a sexy dance, you need to have a sexy face. Meaning you have to look confident, like you know you can seduce the audience with your moves. You hook the audience into what you’re doing with The Magnetic Eye. That pulls them in. And looking confident, you feel confident (fake it till you make it). And feeling confident makes you feel more comfortable in your body, like you know you OWN this body, and you are in complete control of every move it makes, DAMmit. And you feel like you can learn any step the teacher throws your way, and you feel strong and beautiful and like the whole world is yours.

And that was just after the first class…I’m gonna be ruling the world by the end of the eighth session.